Ashlee Blackman
2002 – 2003 “Money for College” Scholarship Winner
Ashlee is from Salem, Oregon and is attending Oregon State University. She is a Business major who plans to own her own apparel store or become a CPA.
While in high school, Ashlee was a member of the National Honor Society and Who’s Who Among American High School Students. She was also a member of the Varsity Golf Team, and volunteered for the Boys and Girls Aid Society, Hoopla, and Salem Bible Students.
Congratulations Ashlee on winning the CFS 2002 – 2003 “Money for College” Scholarship!
“What One Thing or Person Has Had the Most Influence on Your Life and Why?” by Ashlee Blackman
When I look back through my life, I realize how many people and how many experiences have had such a huge influence on my life. Without the influences of my family, friends, and life experiences, I would not be who I am today. But one influence stands out from the others. One influence that will never die from my mind nor my heart, and that is my Mom. She has influenced me in ways that even I don’t think I can understand completely, through her life and through her death.
It was just a year and a half ago that my mom died by taking her own life. She attempted suicide three times, once when I was in fourth grade and another when I was in fifth grade, and the third, just the summer before last, when this attempt became reality. She faced many challenges through her life, starting with a lonely childhood and ending with a lonely death. She faced the death of her baby, divorce, the loss of two jobs, and all this while suffering from clinical depression. Although her death is hard for me to accept and I miss her so much it hurts, I have come to an understanding about her that no one else has. Even though in the end, she gave up, it was not as if she didn’t put up a fight. She faced so many struggles through her life and she tried so hard, but just could never quite make it. Through my mom, I have learned more than I think I ever have or could.
Through her life, and even more so her death, she has made me realize that no matter how tough things get, I can never give up. I want to prove to her and myself that I can do whatever I set my mind to. With the motivation she has given me I know that I have the chance to accomplish any goal or dream I have. I have learned that we shouldn’t sweat the small stuff and that life shouldn’t be taken for granted. Spending time with friends and family, having people there for you, and even something as simple as the sunshine are all special gifts. My mom never saw any of that. Her depression took away her ability to see any of the good things in life. This incident has taught me that being there for someone can make all the difference in the world. I now know that life is a precious thing and is not just about me, but about other people and making them happy, which in part, will make me happy.
From my mom, I learned the exact things she could not. She has given me the chance to learn through her mistakes instead of making the same ones myself. Her influence on me has given me a quality that she could not possess in herself and that is to love life and to live it to the fullest.
|
